A few weeks ago I asked Sam Long to write his views on marriage and when it begins. I know from being his roommate in college that he had a unique perspective on it that I find very intriguing.
Here is a guest blog from Sam Long:
Regan asked me to post a little something based on a conversation we had, oh, 7 years ago.
So I will do my best.
And, you may consider me to be a tool of Satan, or just a tool. Either way, I’m not really worried.
I for one do not stand on ceremony. I consider the marriage ceremony to be merely a matter of compliance to the government (which by the way is why I don’t consider gay marriage as big of a deal as you Focus on the Family people). In addition, I don’t exactly agree with Regan that it is simply a commitment of the heart. Sure, I guess all that is important, but when it comes down to it, I believe a marriage union happens at intercourse. This view agrees with the Old Testament (and I believe New Testament) view of marriage. I cite a few Scriptures:
<>
Deut 22:28-29 “
If a man happens to meet a virgin who is not pledged to be married and rapes her and they are discovered, he shall pay the girl's father fifty shekels of silver. He must marry the girl, for he has violated her. He can never divorce her as long as he lives.” (NIV)
Notice that it is intercourse (though forced) that will bind the two. The “marriage” is a byproduct but the commitment of the rapist to take care of his victim is a lifelong one.
<>
Deut 22:13-14 “
If a man takes a wife and, after lying with her, dislikes her and slanders her and gives her a bad name, saying, ‘I married this woman, but when I approached her, I did not find proof of her virginity...’” (NIV)
Again, the marriage and validity thereof revolves around sex. A man can dissolve his “paper marriage” if the woman cannot make proof of her virginity. In addition, a priest (Levite) cannot marry a non-virgin. It is both a matter of purity and a matter of unity before God.
<>
Now for the implications.
Before God, it is not the priest, rabbi, minister, or justice of the peace that establishes a marriage.
Nor is it some words spoken in a pledge or vow.
The marriage is established and formed when the two become one flesh.
Some of you might say, “So am I bound and responsible for every person I have every slept with?”
My answer is, “Yes.”
The extent of that responsibility is between you and that partner, but I believe in God’s eyes the uniting of one flesh
is the “the marriage ceremony”.
In our society that prohibits polygamy, it is a tough teaching, but one that should be considered.
Let me say that I don’t think we should have more than one wife, and I don’t think that we should engage in extramarital sex.
In addition, this is not a commentary on disciplining an adulterer.
But in my estimation it changes the way in which we view sex, marriage, and the sanctity thereof.
<>
Just sharing some knowledge with ya’ll. Something to think about.
This is Regan again. If you feel you have a more lenghty insight on something we have been discussing, feel free to send it on over to me. Some days I need a day off from blogging. Your lengthy guest comments will prove handy. Just let me know that is what they are for.
Watch out for the potholes.
