A Conversation With Doubt

So I had this conversation recently. I just thought I would share because this isn't the first time these questions have been asked of me.

The Inquisitive Friend: I have been reading some books and I have been thinking about free will. Do we have free will?

Me: Well, I don't think we can prove that we have free will or not, but I think it is useful to live as if you have free will. Does that make sense? The Bible seems to imply that we have free will in multiple sections - where God responds to the actions of people.

The Inquisitive Friend: Yes, that makes sense. I guess it came to mind because of the omni traits of god. Which conflicts with that idea.

Me: Theologically, I'm a proponent of the idea of open theism. That God is going through time with us and that the future hasn't happened yet. You can see in Revelation that it talks about how God is blotting out names in the book of life. Why would they have to be blotted out if he already knew for sure? He's blotting them out based on our decision.

The Inquisitive Friend: That is an interesting thought. So he is confined by our time?

Me: God is not confined. He chooses to go through time with us. He is still all powerful. Take prophecy for instance. A prophecy isn't about having seen the future. Instead, it's about him knowing what he is going to do. He is all powerful and will bring about what he says will happen. He has the power to do that. It isn't like he has seen what he will do; he knows what he wants to happen.

I wrote this a while back: http://regansravings.blogspot.com/2011/01/god-does-not-know-future.html

The Inquisitive Friend: So then he isn't omniscient?

Me: Depends on how you unpack omniscience.I think God knows everything that is to be known. He knows every potential outcome for the future, but the future hasn't happened yet. So it isn't a concrete knowing, but he knows all the possibilities. He created us as free will creatures for some reason, and this was part of what he did.

The Inquisitive Friend (with some serious comic book knowledge): So it is kind of like in Civil War 2 for Marvel. The prediction is a percentage, but there is always a chance to change it.

Me: Right. God is a God of hope trying to always steer us to the better. He knows the possibilities. He is trying to steer us in the right direction. But our choices influence the outcome. The world is the way it is - not because God wants it this way - but because this is the world we wanted. He's prompting us and guiding us to a better world all the time. But we say no way too often. 

The Inquisitive Friend: So is god good? Like morally.

Me: I would say totally. He is the measuring stick of good. But how would we evaluate that? We would come to conversation with our own moral values. As a Christian, I have decided to surrender my moral values to God's moral values. 

The Inquisitive Friend: Why would he not directly intercede on our behalf? I have trouble in that regard. My brain doesn't work right to believe in god. 

Me: I believe he interacts with us much more than we recognize. And when we get in tune with god, it happens even more on a personal level. I totally understand doubting. I think we all have programmed in us certain ideas. Like good. Like beauty. 

The Inquisitive Friend: I can't remember the name of the guy. But one philosophy dude said that regardless of morality it is best to believe in god, tp hedge your bet. Even if it is hollow faith to start. I struggle with the idea of something I can't comprehend. As i got older i felt like praying was just talking to myself. 

Me: I wouldn't say it's about hedging a bet. That makes it all about eternity. I honestly think it is about living the fulfilled life now. It's better to live the life following Jesus. At least that is what I have decided. I would be a follower of Jesus even if there wasn't an eternity because I like the world his views tries to bring about. I like the life of true followers of Jesus. 

The Inquisitive Friend: Faith, as you are stating in your answers, seems more like an active decision rather than a compulsion. 

Me: Well, Jesus taught that the greatest commandment was to love God and love your neighbor. I'm sort of rejecting the experiential thing these days more and more. So it isn't about whether I experience God or whether I feel my prayer is being heard. It's about the good that Jesus wants us to bring into this world. Am I doing that? 

The Inquisitive Friend: I think so. I whole heartedly agree. 

Me: That's really what following Jesus is about. Literally following him in the path of bringing good into the world. Literally following him in helping the world became what it is intended to be. So whether you get an emotional experience or an inspirational high, I don't care.Let's get to following Jesus. 

The Inquisitive Friend: I wonder how that sets with the common good. Jesus said to be in the world but not of it.

Me: he idea that there is even a common good seems to be a philosophical tenet that there is a God who prompts us to what is good.

The Inquisitive Friend: Is man capable of that revelation on its own?

Me: I would say that no man is. But that is an irrelevant question. Because I believe in a God who is prompting every person all the time. We just don't notice it because we are living like zombies, aren't self-reflecting, and aren't examing our lives. 

But again, that prompting comes, not as some supernatural force. It is something that has been happening to us our whole lives. We may call it our conscience. It may be that or something slightly different. But the idea is that when facing a decision, we generally can tell the wrong and right action. We will often choose the wrong though because we want that which the wrong provides. To our detriment. 

The Inquisitive Friend: Does intent matter? Like if I give 1 million to charity but I do it for my public image. Does that negate the good?

Me: It doesn't negate the good it does for others. But it does negate the good it would do for you. I'm reminded of Karl Meninger who taught that the greatest way to get over depression is to love others. But if you are doing it for selfish reasons, then it won't probably provide the benefit to yourself. 

And that's it for now.   

A Series Of Doubts

I wish that I couldn’t honestly say this, but I can and should if I am to be honest with myself and others. I have a lot in common with the Israelites in the Old Testament. I doubt.

They saw God miraculously deliver them from the hand of the Egyptians with the ten plagues. Afterward, they find themselves backed up against the Red Sea with the Egyptian army coming after them. They come up with what would seem to be a rational conclusion given their circumstances: God brought them out there to die.

I remember God providing miraculously for me to minister in Antwerp. Three times now our church has peered over the precipice of being financially broke. Each time, I despaired. Did you bring us this far God just to close this church?

And then God parted the Red Sea. Miraculously, the Egyptians walked across dry ground to get to the other side. And in the process, God even took care of their enemies.

It’s been nearly a year now since we last peered into the precipice. God is good. And each time that we have peered into the precipice, we have received what would seem to be nothing sort of miraculous provisions from God.

Soon after the Israelites reached the other side of the Red Sea, they accused God of bringing them out the wilderness to die. They felt that it would have been better to die as slaves in captivity than to starve to death in the wilderness.

Then I sit down and watch a tragic documentary taken from live video footage of the 2004 Tsunami. People dying. Helpless. Standing there one moment and disappearing into the ocean the next. I wished that it was some fake Hollywood film. And in the back of my mind I can’t help but wonder if there really is a God. And if there is a God, why did He allow that to happen?

Then God miraculously provides manna from heaven for the Israelites to eat. These miracles don’t make sense. Food appearing on the ground in the morning. Food enough for the day but that will rot if you save it for the next. Miracles don’t have to make sense. That’s why they’re miracles.

And God reassures me through a hug from a child that He still loves me. It doesn’t make sense. The death and the tragedy of what I just saw makes God’s love hard to believe. But something is going on with the Spirit in that little hug from a child, and God uses that moment to reassure me.

Then Moses goes away too long. Too long, yet all of this takes place within one hundred days of the exodus, the parting of the Red Sea, and the manna from heaven. But their leader disappears. He went up to the mountain, and he still has not come down. They despair and build a golden calf to worship.

Sometimes I think that we, ministers, don’t express our doubts enough. We’re scared that we will lose our job if we do. So we pretend at times to have super faith, one where we never doubt. And in a weird, twisted way, we are wrongly setting ourselves up to be an idol rather than direct people to the true mentor and Father of us all. And we despair in the fakeness of ourselves.

If we sit still in the midst of all of our searing doubts. If the baby doesn’t move on the ultrasound. If our dearly loved one parts. If that ailment won’t lighten up. If our house is gone from under us or we find ourselves without a job. If during our darkest hour, we take time to be still and silent. If we would just tell God that we want to see Him, we will be satisfied.

“Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives, and the one who seeks finds, and to the one who knocks it will be opened. Or which one of you, if his son asks him for bread, will give him a stone? Or if he asks for a fish, will give him a serpent? If you then, who are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father who is in heaven give good things to those who ask him!” Matthew 7:7-11 (ESV).

The Key to Evangelism and Our Lack of Excitement in Christ

The key to evangelism is to be excited about Jesus and what He is doing. This will lead to us naturally telling others about Jesus in our conversations. If we are not excited, we will be totally ineffective. Excitement might not look the same in each of us; some of us are more exuberant while others are more reserved.  Despite the differences in personalities, excitement cannot help but spring out of our lives. Excitement is contagious. Our love for Jesus should be filled with excitement, overflowing and contagious, not just for what he has done, but what He is currently doing.

Have you ever been in a church service where they want you to cheer for Jesus like you would cheer at a sporting event? With the same excitement and fervor? It’s a little awkward. We are being asked to celebrate an event in the past. I’m an Ohio State fan, and if you told me the story of how they won the National Championship in 2002 by Maurice Clarrett running for a 5-yard touchdown in the second overtime - a great story mind you - I’m not going to cheer. I would appreciate the good memory and experience a moment of pride in being an Ohio State fan, but that is about it. But if you were with me watching that game on January 3, 2003, when Clarrett entered the endzone, I was uncontrollably jumping, cheering, and probably trying to clap all at the same uncoordinated time. I didn’t care how foolish I was, I was celebrating; I was excited.

Why do we lack excitement for Jesus like we do for sporting events? That’s the questions speakers try to remedy when they want us to cheer for what Jesus has done. But I think they are missing the point. All too often, we leave the work of Jesus in the past and expect excitement to come as a result of past facts rather than present blessings. He died on the cross, established the kingdom, and showed us how to live – all awesome stories. More than just awesome, they are life changing, but we don’t celebrate with exuberance events in the past.

What needs to happen for us to become excited is to allow the Spirit to work in the present. When we do that, our excitement will be natural, spontaneous, and unstoppable. If we suffer from a lack of excitement and claim to be followers of Jesus, it is because we have left Jesus in the past, whether as a historical redeemer some 2000 years ago or in the past of our life where we experienced his forgiveness for the first time or his miraculous provision in some way; if we lack excitement, we are not currently experiencing Him because experience inevitably breeds excitement.

God is the God of the present, just as much as he is the God of the past, and he honors our seeking him. We will continually encounter Him if we seek Him with all of our heart, soul, body, and mind – with our whole being. To experience Him, we have to live a life of risk and live dangerously. We need to tackle those issues we have doubts with and seek answers from God. We need to step out where we are uncomfortable and rely on His sustenance. We need to be willing to look like a fool for Christ. We need to experience God for ourselves, in the present, wherever we are. This builds excitement like nothing else. This will result in us being great evangelists of His message along with the added benefit of living life more fully.

The Church is not a Collection of Perfect People, The Church is a Gathering of Seeking Sinners

After Jesus told the Samaritan woman the secrets of her life, she asked him a theological question she was hung up on.  Like the Samaritan woman, we need to not be afraid to ask the questions that frustrate us or make us have doubts.  Christians need to be people who are willing to talk about the tough questions of faith, but too often we avoid those topics and ignore those who want to talk about them.  People who get frustrated and do not want to have an honest discussion over an issue are typically people who have not thought the issue through and are standing on sandy ground.

We need to be people who don’t look down on people when they are struggling with religious issues.  It is only through struggling that we will find the truth.  Too often in the past, the church has been a place where you have to pretend to be perfect and pretend to believe all of the right answers.  That just should not be.  Church should be a place where broken sinners gather together to encourage one another to love their neighbors and help each other along in their struggles and doubts.

The church is often labeled a bunch of hypocrites.  The only way to stop being labeled that is to acknowledge that we are a collection of fallen sinners who are trying to follow Jesus to the best of our ability through the strength he provides.  We are hypocrites when we try to appear perfect, so let us be transparent about our sinfulness.  We are Christians saved by grace when who are trying to following Jesus to the best of our ability.  Unfortunately, we frequently fail. 

Let us throw off the tendency to put on our superChristian disguise, the one where we have all of the right answers and present a façade of perfection.  That’s dangerous.  Let’s not ignore the problems in our faith.  We need to hit them head on and wrestle openly with them.  Let’s not lie to ourselves about the problems in your life.  If we do, these unaddressed problems will slowly sneak up on us until we are worship with faithless motions while living a powerless faith.  We need to go to God with our spiritual dilemmas, whether it is for divine guidance or revelation.  That’s part of seeking.  All too often we are willing to accept a paper Jesus, one we have constructed, rather than the real Jesus who will challenge our thoughts and actions.  He does not always fit perfect in our nice, religious box, but he does bring freedom.